the dip.

My book comes out in a little more than two weeks and I figured it was a good time to write down how I’m feeling. (So when I’m on Oprah I’ll remember.)

Seth Godin calls it The Dip and it’s the time in the valley during any creative process. This isn’t the mountain peak stuff, it’s the opposite kind of stuff. The pit. The time when lots of people quit - which is the good news because it’s the time we can separate ourselves from the imitators - but it’s also the time when we feel like crap - which is the bad news and it makes us feel like an imitator ourself.

These “dips” happen all over the place and I could say I’m in one now. Which is not necessarily a creative dip - the book is done - but more of a fear dip. But, if you think about it, all dips are basically fear-based in one way or another so I figured I would write out my current fears - two weeks from launch - and consider it therapeutic to the whole process.

As to how or why I went from elation to a dip, well as my wife said “It’s getting real. People are about to read this. You’re about to find out.”

Yeah.

It might help you wherever you’re at as well.

Petty Fears
Layout errors. What if a margin is uneven? What if something is off-center?
Textual errors - What if something happened during the endless copy/pastes?
Spelling errors - What if a bad spelling made it past me and two editors?

Ego Fears
What if I actually can’t write even though I think I can? What if I’m the kid on American Idol who is the only one in the room who doesn’t know they can’t sing and thinks everyone else is an idiot?

What if it’s a good book but no one cares? What if what I think important isn’t? What if my stories, my perspectives, and my intuition is just plain boring?

What if the good comments are actually people just being nice? What if the people who say nothing are just following the old rule of “say nothing if you can’t say anything nice…”

Deep Fears
What if I wasted years of time, lots of dollars, and heaps of energy… for nothing of substance?

What if I don’t even know what substance is? What if I’m distracted by success under the guise of meaning?

What if my base motivations in life are pretty vain and/or empty?

Yeah, once you start going down the list of fears things can get pretty hairy, pretty fast. But, like all fears, they are usually based on “what if”?

So… since we’re playing a what if game?

What if this is the greatest thing I’ve ever created and it will change the world?

And that’s fear’s game isn’t it? Even typing that line feels inauthentic, arrogant, and almost crazy so I default to the more “normal” fears that seem more acceptable because they don't say “Who do you think you are?”.

Which is so strange in itself, isn’t it? Fear only lets you ask certain what if’s and feel reasonable about it, even if they aren’t.

So, no matter where you’re at in the creative process… screw the “reasonable” “acceptable” what if’s and start living for the more “wild” and “revolutionary” ones.

Of course, they may not come true either but what if life is just more fun creating stuff with wild dreams swimming in our heads?